Saturday, December 6, 2008

dilemma

After having sailed into the sea of her "so-called" strong relation, she one day realized, that it was time she opened her eyes to reality. She had immense faith on her own ability to carry on with her love as well as on him. It was a dream come true when she had found him. They had been madly in love with each other. There was not one thing on earth when they felt that it was not meant to be. They were on cloud nine, until now. The more the time went by, the more she had a notion that things were not "so" bright now. Although he constantly reminded her of how much he loved her and how much he wanted to be with her, she still could not come to terms with him.
He was not much expressive with his feelings for her. It was just that he somehow managed to get through. Maybe she expected a lot from him, but he could hardly come up to the mark. This made her mad. She could not handle the relation anymore. She constantly reminded him of what was he like in the very beginning. But, he, in the spirit of being more mature, or whatever was it, paid less heed to what she felt. They were an awesome pair, noone like them. But, something, somewhere was amiss. She felt that something was still missing. She could do anything to repair the damage, if ever there was one. On the other hand, he did not feel different about anything. Everything was the same for him. He could never realize that if he did not pay attention to her, things would not be the same ever. Time was running out. It was now or never.
Something had to be done, but what? She could not decide what to do to make him come back to her, if at all he had gone. Was she hallucinating??? Or was it for real?? Does it happen to every one, was all she could think. Why is it happening to me, was what she often felt. Her happiness knew no bounds when she found him. The more she spoke to him, the more she had a reason to survive. Her sole aim was 'to be' with her love. She wanted to reach her destination, to climb the mountain peak, where serenity resided.
She often felt that she loved him much more than he loved her. She also felt that he was never in love with her. She knew it was not true, still something troubled her. She didn't know what, but she still knew. Sometimes she felt that putting an end to her sweet relatio would be the right choice. But, she could not let herself come to it. Something stopped her from doing so. She could not bear the pain of estrangement. Meare the thought of it made her cry for hours together. Maybe what she wanted was too far away to happen.
If only he understood her well and properly, could things be in place again. If only he gave her the kind of love and attention that she required, could they have been together today. But, as luck would have it, his indifference to her feelings and being in his own world was what kept her worried. She knew it well that such an attitude was not going to keep them together. Her dilemma was taking her senses away. She was dying gradually. She needed to be with him. If onle he knew.......if only he felt te same as her..........if only.......

5 comments:

Arundhati said...

well portrayed !
i wonder why i just remembered 'The Wedding' by Nicholas Sparks. . you should read his works, u knw, if u havent yet; he writes wonderfully. oh but try to get 'The Notebook' by the same author before that! Wedding is a sequel to The Notebook.. they re beautiful novels. A movie was also made on the latter, which was equally good.
CHEERS !

WolverineOnFrenzo said...

Neither my english nor thinking is so advanced to get the sense. Afterall im a typical mp board hindi student.
However indirectly u inspired me to read it- the wedding.. Seems interesting to some extent that i could able to catch the theme.. Man . Writing is nt such easy job.. U wud be far intellegent to my expectations.. Nice to visit u here.. Another gud use of blogging.. .

RChX said...

Beautiful Yaar!!

shashank said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sumran said...

nice, tangled :)

well, I always felt 'If Only' was the strongest combination of two simple words that can possibly create a mirage of myriad thoughts !